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very close to my own age. I haven't really felt this. I moved from Boston in 2014 and have lived in SF and Oakland for four years. I know monogamy isn't impossible to find here, but it seems that within the circles I spend time in (with weird, countercultural people, like electronic music venues in particular most of the attractive women are socialites who don't want to settle down. Transplants, how is dating similar or different outside the Bay Area? I feel like dating was easier for me when I lived in Boston - I had good luck from time to time, and generally felt like things were working. He feels that people in the Bay Area seem to be commitment phobic.
I don't often match with women 5 years younger than. I went to burning man a while ago and am familiar with the whole unicorn / poly culture in the Bay Area. I've never been on a first/second/third date that ended up with a hookup.
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My match rate outside of SF (still within the Bay Area) is significantly higher, maybe 2-3x the matches. For anyone who's dating and wants commitment as your end game, what has been your experience? A good friend shared a similar experience with me, and said he had basically given up on finding a partner for years, until by luck he met his current girlfriend. He met his wife in college in FL so he's never dated here but only heard this from friends. I wonder if part of that is just the way dating has changed so quickly in the past 4-5 years, and, were I to move back to the east coast, perhaps I might experience the same thing I experience here - noncommittal, non monogamous dating. However, I have a harder time finding women I connect with, and I'm pretty sure I want a monogamous relationship.
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